DRCs 04-04-08

by Brandon on

Let’s pretend the D stands for “Delightful.”

Not only did Cruis’n USA have a car in it but the home version put a T-Shirt on the lady that gives you a trophy.

Actually, I remember at the time Cruis’n USA did come out I thought it was the most realistic racer ever. I don’t know if this is because my memory is skewed and I dont’ remember better racers at the time or if it really did take a way too long for the non-arcadey racer to appear.

As a side note, I know Road Blasters was realistic but since it’s a vision of the future its realism obviously does not apply to modern driving. – Boris Stoke

Brandon: Road Blasters sounds like the title for a porn flick.

Beer makes love both possible and probable, so I’m gonna say it had to have come first. – lisamarie8

Brandon: Hey I know you!

Trophy girl from Cruis’n USA is in porn that you can find on the internet. While we’re talking about VC, when will I be able to play ChrisV82 in Blades of Steel? – BeerInTheDark

Brandon: Was she in Road Blasters?

Those Wonderboy games have a really messed up history. – Trickydick007

Brandon: I really didn’t like Adventure Island when it came out. In fact, just thinking about it makes me angry. SO ANGRY.

I’m going to Venice on Wednesday! Yay!

By the way, when is King President getting its own section on the forum? Hell, when is it getting a mention on the site? Vaporware doesn’t advertise itself you know! – Dolphin

Brandon: Pretty sure there has to actually be something first to advertise.

Brandon I have a Lithuanian roomate and we were playing Brawl and he had a corded controller and he lost and got really angry about it because he’s a total fucking whiny pussy and he sorta threw the controller down with a slammy-yanky-motion and my Wii got yanked off the table it was on and crashed onto the floor.

It still works fine because it’s a Nintendo product, but what’s the appropriate punishment here? I mean, the motherfucker’s not even grateful that he gets to play Brawl even though we’re in Europe. – Miz

Brandon: As soon as I saw “corded controller” that’s all I needed to see before knowing what the problem was. Who is to blame for that?

That master system video is too high tech and flashy for this website. What do you guys think you are kotaku or something? – Mark

Brandon: BETTER.

The offer is always open!

By the way, Applebees was okay. – Stolle

Brandon: It always is.

Brandon is a don tat is bran. Hahahahahaha! That’s still funny! – mfenig

Brandon: IS IT.

I decided to play Brawl this weekend, since my daughter’s boyfriend left it at my house. They weren’t there so they could not say anything. Anyways, when I started it, it gave me a screen about earning some music that I could play. I was getting no reaction from my wiimote pointer. I finally got the music to play by pounding random buttons. I guess I could have read the instruction booklet. Instead I played Excite Truck. – greywheel

Brandon: Excite Truck is the Wave Race of the Wii…once in a blue moon I’ll pop it in and get hooked all over again.


What are you thinking putting a MOVING GRAPHIC on the front page. There’s no way she can take the strain! – A Sad Pathetic Little Man

Brandon: That’s why I held off on doing these for a few days…I simply didn’t want there to be TOO MUCH content.

I just want to be in the DRC list so no one forgets me. If no one notices me I die. – TinyBruce

Brandon: You shouldn’t let people know that.

DC area softball league starts tomorrow! We’re playing on the Mall. Hopefully it won’t be rained out. – NSavageDX

Brandon: Hey I was playing shuffleboard at the Rocket Bar just last night. I think that’s more fun than softball.

Is it bad that whenever I get Rickrolled, I not only watch the entire video but sing along to it as well? – Bucket

Brandon: Yes.No.

I’ve been trying to write a Zelda based movie, but I’m not sure if anyone out there wants to watch a little boy run around in green tights for two hours. Any suggestions? – Finlae

Brandon: Try renaming it “Peter Pan.”

Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island? – Ron Burgundy

Brandon: Take me to Pleasure Town.

Wow, you play Culdcelptgz Saga a whole bunch. You got your $40 bucks worth eh?

I wish you liked Halo. Co op play is a blast. We had some pretty awesome dork (7 of us, plus my roommate) matches going Sunday night. Custom matches with strange and unusual names like Pirate Ships, Sumo and Grifball abounded.

We should play some co op Gears again. That was fun. – graddy

Brandon: I tried Halo (or Halo 2?) on the original XBox and I couldn’t stand it. I finally finished Culdcept’s epic story mode, so I’ll hit you up for Gears soon! And yes, I totally got my 40 bucks worth.

So the site is currently running, but it’s April Fool’s Day. So does that mean this was all a cruel joke, and when April 2nd hits we’ll be back to a missing domain name and all that jazz I’m used to? – Dewey

Brandon: Cross your fingers!

There’s a lot of WoW talk in that batch. Tyler’s my favorite orc warrior, but don’t tell Al. He has a jealous streak.

Okay so the important question, who’s your favorite hunter?? – The Fake Emily

Brandon: Tapeworm dressed up as Shadowscream is my favorite hunter.

Put your pants on. It’s not funny anymore. – Clay

Brandon: But it’s baseball season!

Zelda move trailer = April fools joke. – Selendrile

Brandon: You think?

Does any dork still play WoW? I’m considering starting my account again, but won’t play if I don’t have people to play with. – Magihiro

Brandon: There’s still people playing, yes, and probably even more so when the expansion comes out. But you won’t find me there! Cold turkey!

I’m just now getting around to looking and seeing the new page. Everyone was talking about it and going on and on but I figured they were all lying and I didn’t want to be let down.

I don’t know what Web 2.0 is, but this page seems like a Web 2.0 update from the old one.

Good job. – dookie

Brandon: Don’t worry, I have no idea what Web 2.0 is either.

Glad to see you guys are back, and just when I got a wii, too.

What kind of tunes are you listening to these days? If memory serves you always had an interesting track or two to share.

P.S. Does somebody want to activate my board account? No? Oh. – Survivor

Brandon: If your board name is Survivor, consider yourself activated! As for music, I just bought the new Apples In Stereo this morning, which is actually old Apples In Stereo, but I’ve been a fan since their first, so I dig it.

Holy crap, you guys are back!

I was a regular reader from like 2000-2005. My favorite writer was Carl I-forget-his-last-name. He had talent. Wrote an awesome article on Miyamoto that quite possibly made me gay for a few weeks there.

I think I made the DRCs once. Can you make it twice? – chopsuey

Brandon: No, I’m sorry.

I can hardly believe that Nintendorks is back. Oh, the memories… the weird, weird memories.

Welcome back! Do I get anything for still having the “Visit Nintendorks.com for your daily fix” thingy on my web page for the past several years? – DavidDayton

Brandon: You get the pleasure of knowing that you suckered people into visiting a site that didn’t exist.

Oh, shit, the DRCs are back! Now I can stop clicking on Nintendorks in my bookmarks and being sad and start clicking on Nintendorks in my bookmarks and being bemused.

I shall stroke my beard and re-evaluate the future. – RedSix

Brandon: People don’t use the word “bemused” as often as they should. Good job.

Every night (morning?) at 3am my cat headbutts me into wakefulness. She’s not hungry (the dish is full of food) and she doesn’t want attention (she bites me if I try to pet her), so my question to you is:

Do you know of an easy way to kill a cat? – satchmo

Brandon: Bash its brains in with a hammer.

wow its good to see you guys back. i remember back when I was in seventh grade and you guys just changed to Nintendorks. Back then, Matt Cassamina did an interview with you guys on the site and you guys experienced a huge site hit.

I used to tell people that I run this site and my “alias” was Scott Delbango. They all believed me, unfortunately, I couldn’t pick up any chicks with that. Turns out sports is really the way to go.

Now, I am graduating from college in a month and don’t know what I’m doing. So I think I am going to end up doing my masters.

thanks for listening to my life. – fredassam

Brandon: Scott Delbango is trying to get into advertising, maybe you should do the same!

Orange Soda, MEKsLP, Bmano, ineptitude, etc. Do we just have a bunch of Dorks on hold until the main site came back? We missed you guys on the forums! – Hamster

Brandon: No you didn’t.

your heart is true, you’re a pal and a confidant. – Link27

Brandon: If it’s a car you lack, I’d surely buy you a cadillac.

Me and Zureek had a super secret channel named scotchscotchscotch in WoW in which we would make fun of lame orc warriors and other people who weren’t as good as we were. I would have invited you of course but it was after you quit.

…OR WAS IT. – Hellboy

Brandon: I had a secret channel where we tried to guess everyone else’s secret channels.

Face it, DeHart, you’re too old for the DRCs! You can’t keep producing those witty retorts that made you a household name on a daily basis! You’re washed up! A has been! Why don’t you just go home? – SquirrelGOD

Brandon: I have to poop.

CellPhoneGuy is wrong; I am living proof that you can be a Nintendork and get laid without the assistance of alcohol, drugs, roofies or any other mind-altering substance.

Although, when I do drink and start feeling tipsy, my wife’s desire to sex me rises by 200%. I must be much cuter when I’m giggly.

I’m not for sure if other people’s desires to sex me rises 200%, but that’s what Dorkfest is for, right? – CNE

Brandon: Weird, for some reason when I picture you and “giggly” all I see is a tan trenchcoat.

Did I ever win one of the Vibes? Or was that just another one of the many foolish dreams I gave up on years ago when my soul dried up and died? I wouldn’t have asked, but the last DRC above the entry box was about the Vibe and it got me started thinking about the Vibe.

The Vibe. – Jai Deliete

Brandon: With The Vibe, everyone was a winner.

Hey Brandon, it’s been TEN YEARS since I joined the staff. Back then we used to think it was funny to call you grandpa. Now that it’s a decade later, what do they call you? – Mike Kuzenski

Brandon: Decrepit old man.

I’m currently watching a show about making Disney Princesses into cakes.

…I can’t think of a punchline, I’m too entranced by Belle’s hoopskirt. – EmeraldTheMaster

Brandon: I’m sure the punchline has something to do with licking the frosting.

Which Super Smash Bros character would you most like to go out drinking with? – Mark

Brandon: What the hell is this, The Vibe? Zero Suit Samus, duh.

Is it strange that I am having a conversation with you entirely through the DRC’s? – CellPhoneGuy

Brandon: I thought that was the whole point of these?

Was it ever possible to get the master sword?

I dont remember there being enough coins. – Brettimus

Brandon: Haha, I don’t think there was. Oh how we laughed at that.