DRCs 04-29-08

by Brandon on

Grand Theft Kart

Anyone’s who’s going too be in the Chicagoland area the next couple of Fridays can get their bottles of NHL Alumni Signature Wines (Tony Esposito Cab or Bobby Hull Chardonnay) signed by the legends themselves for free.

You wouldn’t want to miss that! – Emily

Brandon: You would be wrong.

Hey! – Navi

Brandon: Listen!

I wrote a screenplay for a class, and a featured location is “DeHart High School” – Mark

Brandon: I just googled that, and one doesn’t exist, so thanks!

If peacocks roamed around your neighborhood, would you welcome them or shun them? – Bob Dolio

Brandon: That’d be pretty sweet. I’d be proud as a peacock! Sorry.

What do you know of Mice and Men? – Clay

Brandon: George shoots Lennie.

Nintendorks was my homepage for over five years. I read that New Years letter you wrote hundreds of times. Imagine my excitement when it looked like the site was coming back, only to be disappointed day in and day out.

Two months ago, I change my homepage for the first time, and you guy come back only a few days later?

It’s like high school all over again.

I’m going to listen to the Chronic and ragingly squeak at my parents for 2 hours. – MrOodles

Brandon: Soooo…are we your homepage again or what? What a let-down of a story.

soo last night I got drunk off the case of pacifico we gots… mmm I love me some mexican beer… anyways moral to the story I got drunk and then got laid… only problem is she spent the night 🙁 – getupkid2004

Brandon: Wow, you are SO cool!!!!!!

If Emily’s tri-force window was only “pretty” cool, then I’m only “pretty” old. – A Sad Pathetic Little Man

Brandon: But you’re more than old…oh I see what you’re saying.

I’ll second MLB Power Pros. I hate sports games, but that one was really fun. Part of the game is RPG, leading your player from the minors in an attempt to go pro. Then you have a team management system as well. All this, and you could play Wii Sports style, although I always preferred the simple button presses for the game.

Five Word Review : Baseball RPG? Fun, not complicated. – kindernoob

Brandon: I like the sound of that…too bad Mario Kart and GTA IV just came out.

A few well overdue 5 word reviews:

No More Heroes: Cell-shaded lightsaber battles are sweet.

Zack and Wiki – Quest for Barbaros’ Treasure: Monkey assistants make puzzles fun.

Sonic and the Secret Rings: Annoying theme song, never stops.

Dewy’s Adventure: Awesome, because it’s starring me. – Dewey

Brandon: Thanks!

The end of semester has come, and while I sit in the computer lab and type this, people are frantically coming in looking for a computer to type a last minute paper on.

Yet I continue to hog this computer.

Does that make me a bad person? – rbtr

Brandon: Yes.

It’s my birthday today! I’m 24! I’m sure you put my present in the mail already. – hero

Brandon: Oooooh, it’s too bad I’m reading this well after it was submitted. Yeah…too bad.

Ah, they didn’t want me back because they were concerned for my well-being. That’s sweet. Way to let me down easy, Brandon, although you could’ve lied about that landslide loss a little more, as well. – Duckhammer

Brandon: What if I already did? I didn’t.

I played as Metaknight at the Brawl tournament last week. The first match I played was against a kid using Pit. I made a million mistakes and lost. It was double elimination so I was still in it. After that I calmed down and had a big string of wins. I ended up losing to a guy playing as Ike, I was being way too agressive.

It was only a five dollar buy in. First place got 60% of the pot, second 30%, and third 10%. – Selendrile

Brandon: Soooooo…I’m guessing you didn’t win one of the top three spots? What’s up with everyone starting stories and then not finishing them with the obvious conclusion?

Phantom Hourglass.

$20

Radio Shack.

That is all. – DavidDayton

Brandon: Deal.

Don’t be afraid, Brandon. Take my hand. Let us dance the dance of LIFE!

Oh, and it’s nearly hooker killin’ time! You saw that little bit of gameplay that got linked on the board, right? That game is going to be pure gold, my friend! Fox News is going to go ballistic! – SquirrelGOD

Brandon: It’s all mine just waiting to be played! See you in LC.

I might go to Tennessee this summer. What’s there to do in Memphis? – Gus

Brandon: Graceland, obviously. Beale Street is the other tourist attraction…that is, if you like walking around drinking. There might be a concert or something down on Mud Island. Stay away from Orange Mound.

I moved to Northern Virginia in February, but I haven’t seen you yet. Can we be friends? – The Rinker

Brandon: I need more details. Like what part of NoVA, and your nationality.

I have over 10k gold in WoW, what does that make me? – Opty

Brandon: Rich biotch?

Brawl still hasn’t been released in Australia yet. And they say we’re not a third world country. – Impatient

Brandon: Haha, how wrong they are.

So, in the $5 Footlong commercials, when the fake Godzilla man-in-suit makes the $5 Footlong hand sign thing, shouldn’t instead the hand sign be Godzilla showing about inch between his thumb and index finger? Since, if man-in-suit Godzilla is truly large, the footlong sub would be tiny to him? – CNE

Brandon: I have no idea because I haven’t seen the commercial, but I just had a $5 sub! They had pepper jack cheese, which I was excitied to see. And eat.

Umm… Considering that Lisa Loeb once starred in an E! channel reality show, and that hipsters only watch reality shows that appear on Bravo, I reject the assertion that she possesses any indie cred. That said, someone who sends DRCs in still probably doesn’t have a realistic shot with her. – hipster

Brandon: You make a bevy of good points.

The new Islands album is pretty good. – Gorfious

Brandon: I didn’t even know there was one!

Are you still writing stuff in Cold Fusion? I became a software developer since you guys have been gone and I spend most of my time in C#, Delphi, and ASP.net.

Did you guys write the site in ASP.net or PHP and the likes? I really like the site design, it feels almost like reading a newspaper. It feels very crisp. – Dazz07

Brandon: Still doing Cold Fusion, yeah. Hell if I know what the site uses…I just installed some blogging software that was free with my ISP…although I do use php for the magic that is DRCs.

I’ve got a 20 min oral exam in 6 hours with my professor. How do I guarantee an A? – DRZZY

Brandon: I think you answered your own question.

I was going to come up with some really terrific way to honor your birthday, Brandon, but then I remembered that I was going to spend 8 hours of that day watching those hobbit movies and getting drunk at the Arlington Cinema Drafthouse. I wasn’t sure how you would feel about that. If it makes you feel any better, I can promise to throw up onto some fans ugly, bare hobbit feet. – matthew

Brandon: It’s the thought of throwing up that counts, thanks.

re: “I do to, but only because I won’t have some jackass standing on the back of my kart.”

My favorite part of Double Dash was using Mario and Baby Bowser in Waluigi’s kart. I’d have Mario drive and constantly be pressing the item button because the horn sounded like a fart and Bowser’s “I got no item!” dance always made me laugh.

I’d say go check it out yourself, but simply by making you aware of it I’ve over-hyped it completely. It’s one of those things you have to catch by chance to be funny. Like the goomba powering up his swing in Mario Baseball. – dookie

Brandon: Maybe there’s some youtube or porn based on it. The internet has EVERYTHING!

What should I do with my life? (I can’t rock.) – REVLIK

Brandon: Roll.

Who the hell is Ace Frehley? – Kid A

Brandon: Die in a fire.

My roommate actually had me burn him like 4 Ace Frehley CDs… And he went to see him live. Apparently he almost caught on fire during the show. – yanca

Brandon: Haha, I swear I didn’t see this comment before the previous one. That’s just eerie.

im typing this drnuk and nakey – pepsiscrub

Brandon: Hot.

Happy Birthday DeHart. Obviously you leveled up in life. – Jbond64

Brandon: I’ve yet to decide where to spend my talent points.

ARGH first DRC for meee

Why do the forum gods hate me?

is the forum down or is my internet being stupid? – Smotang

Brandon: I just checked the “Smotang” account, and everything seems kosher so I’d say something is stupid on your end.

Happy Birthday!

You light up my life

You give me hope

To carry on

You light up my days

and fill my nights with song – Chargrock

Brandon: How sweet. Did you write that yourself? It’s so poetic and profound.

Happy Birthday Brandon. I’ll celebrate it with a beer for breakfast. – fake emily

Brandon: The Replacements would be proud.

I hope the Subspace Emissary doesn’t get ridiculously hard once you get to the maze. I don’t know if my wife would put up with it, and I have a hard enough time cajoling her to play with me as it is. And I’ll never get the cat to play either. I should look into getting friends. – Mister of the Universe

Brandon: The only hard part about the maze is the final battle, and even that’s not so hard once you figure it out. Your cat could do it.

Happy Birthday, Brandon! I attempted to mail you a cake but the mailman said I needed your credit card number before I could mail it to you, though, so it’s sitting here on my counter not being eaten instead. – Opty

Brandon: I think your mailman can’t be trusted!

Does Trent truly need to pee in your butthole to be a true Nintendork? – Eric

Brandon: I didn’t know that was ever a question.

Quoted directly from Sven, from the Dorktionary, from the Message Board Hall of Fame:

“Seven Flavors of Ass: I’m not sure if these are correct, but I have them saved on my computer nonetheless:

1. Cheddar

2. Salisbury Steak

3. Tabasco

4. Onion

5. Soy

6. Pumpernickel

7. Vannila Cream” – Magihiro

Brandon: I guess you can’t argue with historical facts!

I defeated Kefka, so Final Fantasy VI is complete. Overall, a satisfying retro romp. I’ll probably work on Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones next. – Gato

Brandon: I almost added you as a Mario Kart friend last night but didn’t remember if you were getting it or not. True story.

Why was Jason Priestley at the Mario Kart Wii Launch? Why does anyone care about him? Who said to themselves, “oh MAN JASON PRIESTLEY? Sign me up. SIGN ME UP FOR SOME OF THAT.” Why was his hair so terrifying? – RubixsQube

Brandon: Obviously it was so people could tell him how cool his 90210 character’s name was. And to ask if he’s seen Tiffani Amber Theissen naked.

I already had the gay once back in ’82. Am I inoculated against this new strain of the gay? – Meatsim

Brandon: That depends on where you were inoculated, if you catch my drift.