DRCs: 09-18-10

Your blood oath has been fulfilled.

Actually, Mario’s already been to outer space over ten times… Here are the non-Galaxy entries:- Six Golden Coins- Yoshi’s Island- Paper Mario 2- SMRPG- All 3 Smash Brothers- Six words: “May the pizza be with you.”I also get the feeling a Party or two was on the moon but will leave that as an exercise to the reader. – The Kid

Brandon: I read that at least three times thinking I was deciphering some form of the Divinci Code.

satchmo: Maaan, I HATE exercise!

Hey, wasn’t maw the admin at the shitty ezboard years ago? He’s STILL bitter about not being in charge anymore? What a dickhead. Also, flute certainly does belong in rock ‘n roll. Why else would Axe Cop‘s band, Axe, have a Chinese wrestler who plays the flute. Axe Cop is an authority on all things awesome. – Dr. Penguin

Brandon: I thought it was mew. Was it maw? I stopped caring as soon as I started typing.

Jethro Tull: Fuckin yeah! FLUTE ROCK!

World Cup starts this week! On my to-do list: 1. sit in rain2. find brandon3. talk about World CupMake it so. – hero

Brandon: Two guys one World Cup.

satchmo: I hate to break it to you, but I think you got stood up.

Why do you only love Satchmo when you are drunk? – Kyle Walters Esquire

satchmo: The same reason your mother loves you.

If you ever thought it would be great if AJ sent a DRC that was composed one-handed during a covert under-the-desk masturbation sesion, then today is your lucky day. – AJ

Brandon: I was just telling my friends the other day, “You know what would be great…?”

satchmo: AJ doesn’t masturbate – he gets bitches to do that shit for him.

Satchmo is like a mean you. – A Sad Pathetic Little Man

satchmo: That’s a funny way to spell awesome.

Brandon: I thought that was a great response until I realized it makes me NOT awesome. So I’ll say that’s a funny way to spell DUMB JERKFACE.

I love to chat my ass off!! 🙂 – twilightlover18

Brandon: a/s/l?

satchmo: Since you read Twilight, you must also love growing old alone.

Funniest damn thing since Frustration seriously, you should have your own TV show – a Robot Chicken for video games – Jonathan

Brandon: I thought you were joking until you said “seriously.”

satchmo: But Robot Chicken isn’t funny…

Hi! tee hee! – tubular culosis

Brandon: Hello, friend!

satchmo: I don’t like you.

is that zelda –

Zelda: Yes?

satchmo: Is that a question?

If Miyamoto is so smart, why doesn’t he speak English? – tubular culosis

Brandon: He does. With his MIND!

satchmo: What’s the Japanese word for Zipperhead?

This is more of a request than a comment, but could we send some requests for word combinations in to you for you to test in Super Scribblenauts? Do you think you could film it and upload it? Pretty please? – Jonathan

Brandon: Sure! We’ll get right on that.

Just so you know, the reason it was glitching out was really because of interference. I know, I know, it may sound like its a Steve Jobs kind of excuse, but hear me out. The way the wii remote works basically is through IR. In that particular press room, there were tons of people with laptops, phones, cameras etc, all of which do cause interference. The people from Kotaku chose to play with the 3DS’s *cough*models*cough* and played Zelda later, which they reported, that without all of the interference, worked flawlessly. – Jonathan

Brandon: It’s nice when people read the main page.

satchmo: There’s a main page?!

Has anyone seriously tried searching for Atlantis in the Bermuda Triangle? I feel like it’s such an obvious spot that no one bothered looking. – tubular culosis

Brandon: I bet that’s also where they’ll find Duke Nukem Forever.

satchmo: Atlantis is in all of us.

“From my short time with the game on the show floor, I believe they have [made Super Scribblenauts perfect].”Kevin, you hype-monger! Don’t play with me like that! – Maples

Brandon: I’ve had many a talk with Kevin about when he mongs hype. My apologies.

I hope Rubix gets elected King of E3. – gato

Brandon: I hope he gets elected King of the World.

satchmo: He’s King of my pants!

Dude, what is the 8-bit song that plays in the Mario-2 intro of all the E3 videos?? My hunch is it’s from Link’s Awakening, inside someone’s house. Am I close? Do I get a prize? – Ukuku

Brandon: It’s actually Nickelback. No one wins in this situation.

the “good night, day two” dance made my thursday. – MEKsLP

Brandon: Sorry about your life!

SuperRad is officially on my shit list after that deer video. SuperRad? More like SuperFuckingSad 🙁 – satchmo

Brandon: Awwwwkward!

satchmo: Great. I made myself cry. And I didn’t even have to look in a mirror wah waaah!

I hope Kirby: Epic Yarn sucks, because then I can say “MORE LIKE EPIC YAWN” and appear to be clever. – tubular culosis

Brandon: You don’t have to appear to be clever, my friend.

satchmo: Would you go out with me?

Hey guys, I just wanted to say that once again, you guys have done an amazing job with your E3 coverage. I really feel that you guys do some of the best coverage, and it’s of things that I actually care about.

Keep up the great work; I’m looking forward to the next E3 and whatever the hell is there. – A Loyal Reader

Brandon: Yeah, I did a great job.

satchmo: I’m sure the guys appreciate such a heartfelt comment. Guys.

Brandon: Guys.

How come you guys didnt write about the new Sony 3SP at e3?

Its awesome, the 3sp ( 3 second playstation) now allows for 3 seconds of gameplay/loading before the battery dies! – smotpoker

satchmo: Batteries are so dramatic – they’re either working or they’re dead.

Brandon: HAHAHAHAHA! There is so much comedy in this comment!

Wait, Retro is making a new Donkey Kong, but Activision is remaking Goldeneye?

Am I missing something here? – smotpoker

Brandon: Einhorn is Finkle! Finkle is Einhorn!

satchmo: Are those video games?

Cocoa puffs are like sex, you can never get enough…Plus its fun to eat cocoa puffs during sex. You should try it… – Cdub

Brandon: I think it’s entirely possible to get enough sex involving Cocoa Puffs. By the way, it’s also fun to eat vagina. You should try it.

satchmo: I bet you are overweight.

rubix will you marry me

_ yes _ no

feel free to answer this as well brandon – superrad

Brandon: FINE!

satchmo: Bitch you dead!

about viewtiful joe, i didint find the game that difficult. in fact i beat the game, the 2nd one, and the third one – david

Brandon: I beat the 5th one. With my MIND.

satchmo: Well isn’t that special.

rubix will you marry me

_ yes _ no

feel free to answer this as well brandon – superrad

Brandon: You’re being too pushy. I don’t think we’re ready for this.

satchmo: Bitch you still dead!

I need a new computer. Make Travis and Kevin buy me one. – Mark

Brandon: No.

satchmo: You need a lot more than a new computer, friend.

I bet if Garret says “Nambo Jam” enough times it will eventually become a popular catchphrase. Keep tryin’ little buddy! – Paula Abdul-Jabbar

Brandon: So long as he doesn’t say it three times while looking in a mirror.

satchmo: Garret is good people – I believe in him AND his voodoo magic.

I don’t like Cocoa Puffs. – Opty

Brandon: But what if you put the Cocoa Puffs on some fried chicken?!?

satchmo: Brandon, that’s racist.

I rly wanna play the freaking game it it comes out. I have to wait for like a long time though D= It hasn’t been released yet EVEN THOUGH the game already works!!! I am going to kill somebody because I have to wait so long! Oh and my nickname is apkaz lol.

Sincerally, Apkaz – Apkaz

Brandon: What.

satchmo: You talk like a nigger.

It is probable that Dragon Quest 22 will be released by the time drc’s are updated. Here is my 5 word review on Dragon Quest IX ( thats 9 to all you people who cant count with 3 letters)

Penis Wont Fit Game Cartridge – smotpoker

Brandon: I don’t know, was it released yet?

satchmo: A penis can fit anything if you just believe.

Is it true that Whitsky used to own slaves? – Mark

Brandon: Yes. And she rode on their backs until their knees broke.

satchmo: What do you mean “used to”?

Yeah, 64 followers on twitter. Now to hit 128. Then 255. Then 256 and have it crash. Speaking of, I’m surprised this site has been going strong for so long. I guess you guys know how to run websites now, only took you about a decade to figure it out. – Skoad

Brandon: Go fuck yourself.

satchmo: You’re white trash. How long is it going to take you to figure that out? HA HA HA.

Sweet! Scribblenauts was my most wanted game of 2009, and Super Scribblenauts is set to become my most wanted game of 2010! Let’s hope this really will be A CLASSIC – Luke

Brandon: Let’s hope I don’t die of CANCER.

satchmo: My most wanted game of 2010 is A NOT SHATTERED CHILDHOOD.

Remember – When these were actually “daily”

Brandon: Ya. Yeah. YES.

satchmo: Remember when girls actually liked you? OH WAIT!

lonlonjp owns all of your assholes. – Douche-face

Brandon: What’s the interest rate?

satchmo: Don’t you ever make me google again, asshole.

Good to see the DRC’s are updated with the same frequency as they were 10 years ago! – Battymo

Brandon: Oh I get it! 10 years ago there were no DRCs.

satchmo: Battymo? That’s a weird way to spell ASPLM.

Sodomy. – Battymo

Brandon: Sorry, you’re going to have to talk to lonlonjp.

satchmo: HIGH FIVE!

i love this game – nepal

Brandon: These are DRCs – are you talking about the waiting game or the crying game?

satchmo: FREE TIBET!

Actually, that time I hung out w/my cousin was AWESOME.

And my nipples are painfully erect. – vaginaboob

Brandon: My nipples are painfully erect when I’m around your cousin too!

satchmo: Incest is fun!

How does this work? – John

Brandon: YOU DID IT!

satchmo: HOORAY!

That news from August 24 was the best material served up here in a long time. – Eldaron

Brandon: Yep, Chris is pretty much the best reporter we have.

satchmo: He also has a huuuuuge dick.

Yesterday on TV I turned to what I thought was “Devil Wears Prada,” but turns out it was “Devil Wears Nada.” Still not sure how I felt about that. – []!

Brandon: Awesome?

satchmo: I bet you felt like ejaculating.

Why do you continue to ignore Twitter? – DCX

Brandon: Because I’m an asshole.

satchmo: Because he’s not a TWIT HA HA HA!

Hope yall are having a happy Jewish new year. L shana tova! – Branden

Brandon: I dated a girl in high school named LaShana Tova!

satchmo: Here can’t be jews!

While you read this, I will be seeing Free Energy and Titus Andronicus and I just made you jealous. – DCY

Brandon: I’m seeing them on Friday, BIIIITCH!

satchmo: I’m sitting alone quietly on Friday. SIGH!

If you had a pal like Jake the dog (Adventure Time), what shape-changing activity would he perform the most while you’re adventuring?

And yes, he would have been drinking first. – Jai

Brandon: Moon Bounce!

satchmo: Dildo.

Why aren’t you playing Halo Reach now? – AJ

Brandon: This beer tastes like candy.

satchmo: More like Halo Reach Around! AJ’safaglolol!11!

I can’t believe you folks are having a private Dorkfest. Surely the best Dorkfest to occur this week. Such elitism. – WelshCleats

Brandon: It wasn’t private. We just didn’t invite anybody!

satchmo: I invited your MOM.

I’m drunk and surrounded by beautiful women. How would you rate my downward spiral on a scale of your own choosing? – SerratedMarriage

Brandon: Whoa, whoa. Whoa. Okay, wait, whoa. Hold the phone. Are you divorced? Drinking? Because I hadn’t read that in all of your other posts.

satchmo: Fuck bitches get paid.

is this enough drcs for you fags

please give me attention

thanks sasha/brandon

should i grow out my stache again

_ yes _ no – guess who, motherfucks

Brandon: Yes, always yes.

satchmo: Mom??

Make me some more chili. – Hellboy

Brandon: For you, the world.

satchmo: But what about your cholesterol?!?