DRCs: 11-19-10

Dammit, I accidentally registered for Duck Smoking 101.

Happy Halloween! I bet you gave you apples with razor blades in them. – A Sad Pathetic Little Man

Brandon: Nah, I just cut the kids with a knife to save us all time and money.

Hrm, rewatching Evil Dead myself recently, I thought it was even better than I recalled. – Goober

Brandon: It was fun, sure, and I still liked it! It just had more lulls than I remember. And I don’t mean lulz.

I just finished reading “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”. I had high hopes for it going in to it, but it turned out to be a competent, mildly entertaining but forgettable mystery novel. I did enjoy the many Swedish cultural references. I doubt I’ll read the sequels. – Gato

Brandon: A friend of mine tried reading it, and said she couldn’t get past the wacky translation. I was never all that interested. I’ll “read” it years down the road when it’s on TNT and I can’t sleep.

Garman: I really liked the sequel “The Girl with the Subderal Hematoma”

More like monthly reader comments am I right? – HungDaddy

Brandon: Oh shit! Is it that time of the month?

satchmo: We answer DRCs every time Jim posts a funny picture.

Garman: I can’t top that.

Corleone: Silence for Truthiness.

SerratedEdge is innocent! – Bill Stickers

Brandon: That’s not what Jesus said.

satchmo: He’s definitely innocent of raising his kids!

satchmo, hair pie? Thank you! – That Jap guy from Revenge of the Nerds

Brandon: What the fuck is a frush?

Garman: I’m refusing to answer this on the basis of you being ASIAN.

Clam basket is a pretty good euphemism for a vagina. – A Sad Pathetic Little Man

satchmo: Like you’d know, sailor

Brandon: I feel sorry for the vaginas you’ve been around to give them that name.

Garman: Are clam baskets even in season?

Corleone: I’ll have an open face clam basket!

SPOILER WARNING: American Gods ends with Ender Wiggin finding out that the alien invasion wasn’t a game and he becomes a speaker for dead bugs. – tubular culosis

satchmo: I outta wash your mouth out with soap, you LIAR!

Garman: Orson Scott Card =/= Neil Gaiman.

Brandon: Thanks! One less book I need to read, which leaves time for more videogames!

If you like American Gods and Gaiman (and who doesn’t?), you should read Stardust if you haven’t. It’s way better than the shitty movie. Who would have thunk it!? – garman

Brandon: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, BOOK NERD!

satchmo: Corleone, you can stay. Wiiiiiiiiink!

So I finally got my life long dream job at gamestop. Why couldn’t it have been before I graduated from college? – []!

Brandon: Just think of all the pussy you’ll get there!

Garman: Don’t you mean clam basket?

satchmo: Maybe you can trade-in your degree for the new Assassin’s Creed.

I didn’t know that black people were that into pokemon. On a side note, I also just found out that I’m a little bit racist. – cdub

satchmo: Pikachu, I choose you! To LYNCH!

Garman: I’m pretty sure Snorlax is a black guy.

Corelone: Slowbro definitely is.

Brandon: Nintendorks uses racism! It’s super effective!

>Donkey Kong Country Returns comes out next week. AM I EXCITED? Yes, I need a new game to cause me to yell at someone I am playing with when I die. I HAVE AN EXTERNAL LOCUS OF CONTROL. – RubixsQube

Garman: Rumble the Bison is the BEST!

Brandon: I like going to the zoo to yell at monkies!

Corleone: Hey, that’s racist!

I suggested DRCs be submitted via Twitter. Naturally only 3 people were game, but it was a nice change of pace, so if you’re out and about and HAVE to submit a DRC, you can do so @Nintendorks with a #DRC hashtag or whatever floats your muffin.

Nintendo should also trademark the phrase “Donkey Punch” – @markzeo

Garman: Nintendo’s not going to make any games about your mom.

Corleone: Can I get an open face donkey punch?

>You should let me write shitty articles for your awesome website – @markzeo

Brandon: No

satchmo: No

Garman: No

Corleone: Open face no.

>Also, since I am losing my job on Christmas Eve, you should hire me to do something, like be a butler or editor. – @markzeo

Brandon: Maybe you should STOMP STOMP STOMP to the unemployment line.

>What do I need to make a 360 “worth it?” Live, headset, and text pad is on the way. – @hmcp

Garman: Friends.

satchmo: Fleshlight.

Brandon: You said Live, that’s all you need. I’m continuously baffled at XBOX 360 owners who don’t pay for Live. And yeah I guess a fleshlight would make anything worth it.

>DRC = Disappointing Readers Continuously. Boom, Roasted. – @Tim_Mooney

Brandon: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SNAP. Rock Band 3 was to blame, sorry.